Monday, December 22, 2008

"oh wow. that totally sucks" or HA!

she frowns and sucks air
in through her clenched teeth: 'hhhhhhh!'
but her eyes can't lie.

i've come out holding
a purse dripping in toilet
water. schadenfreude.

Saturday, December 20, 2008

poached

just took the hottest
bath in water's history.
and now i'm sweaty.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

sciatic express

misery is the
second after you hard-step
off a six-inch curb.

Friday, December 12, 2008

an inspiration.

did your jet hair stick
to those glossy, ruby lips?
rest in peace, bettie.

Wednesday, December 10, 2008

day dream #1

i stood behind the
irish people on the lift
today. they smell good.

like wet wool and a
mustiness that i can't place.
their voices are thick

and rich and liquid.
bare feet in wet muddy grass,
someplace far away.

Monday, December 8, 2008

Veni, Vedi, Vici

just finished a
sleeve of girl scout cookies to
'take one for the team'.

Monday, December 1, 2008

the premier

Mrs deWitt
spies on her neighbors when she
waters her flowers,

small yellow pansies
in a box just outside
her kitchen window.

Tuesday, November 25, 2008

an acquired taste.

if you hate sharing
treats, just buy salt licorice.
no one will want it.

Monday, November 24, 2008

dream #23

the end comes at once.
jesus, mary, and satan
levitate before

a petrified crowd. they
are made of wax and transform
as they float about.

the Son uses a
thin blade to remove mary's feet.
terror erupts. i

close my eyes but still
see a footless mary writhe
and slither above.

Wednesday, November 19, 2008

worlds within worlds

worlds within worlds, a star is born, or EGGs for breakfast

cream creeps through coffee
in swarms, storms, and sea nettles.
little nebulae.

Friday, November 14, 2008

post meridian.

tequila bounces
down like pinball. ba-ding-ding!
ba-ding-ding! WINNER!

Thursday, November 13, 2008

anniversary.

and five years later
we quiver on this knife's edge
as the wind bellows.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

the end of the road.

the end of the road, or Sarah's Post.

1
technology scares
me. i prefer pencil and
paper, sticks and sand.

2
i get jealous when
david snuggles the cats. i
worry, "they hate me".

3
i wish my breasts were
smaller. teeny pinches with
invisible nips.

4
my favorite word
is scorch. "conifer" used to
occupy this post.

5
i'm sick of spending
sundays with my chin plastered
to the toilet seat.

6
mathematics blows
up my skirt. the number six
is pure perfection.

7
i relish, nay crave,
nay savor, nay bask in the
attention of men.

caustic

the acid reflux
post martini bathed sweet breads
makes for searing dreams

dream #22

super models crisp
up in an elevator
turned deep fry basket.

Monday, November 3, 2008

there are lots of things
scarier than math. like space,
piranhas, and guns.

Friday, October 31, 2008

dream #21

a senile woman
massages rotten meat in
her sixties kitchen.

Wednesday, October 22, 2008

natasha.

natasha.

baby girl, pass the
currant wine. for we are two
drunk kindred spirits.

dream #20

sex with a frenchman
in my parents' basement. rag
rugs, wood paneling.

Tuesday, October 21, 2008

shh.

let's not talk. here's
my brain in a jar: listen
with a stethoscope.

Thursday, October 16, 2008

punish me.

punish me.

chocolate is a
privilege to be earned.
hi. i'm catholic.

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

oof.

mr potato
head's lipless grin chides me while
i procrastinate.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

stereographic projection

stereographic projection

our head rolls along
the fun house mirror.
features shrink and grow,

accordion from
infinity to nothing,
clefts become chasms.

Friday, September 26, 2008

7:19pm

7:19pm

head and tail lamps pass,
careening over your back.
you are perfect, bridge.

i peel my eyes wide
to make an open shutter.
arteries and veins.

Monday, September 15, 2008

there!

there!, or Penis Envy: I Have It

were i a man, i'd
have a giant dick that would
fork off into four

smaller penises.
also notches and faces
like a totem pole.

Wednesday, September 10, 2008

numb

numb, or the child

then your face wrinkled
and your eyes grew watery red
like split tomatoes

Monday, August 25, 2008

fractals

fractals, or Martinis with Mandelbrot

booze lubricates thoughts.
subatomic tea parties.
worlds within my cells.

Monday, August 18, 2008

dream #19

dream #19, or Diana, You Are on my Mind

in my dreams you ate
light bulbs and spoke of shitting
synapsing neurons.

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

dream #18

dream #18, or The Infinity Pool

"so which rich man do
i have to fuck to swim in
this thing? " he smiles: "me."

we fold like paper
cranes under the cold, crushing
weight of the water.

Tuesday, August 12, 2008

fetish

fetish, Girl With Long Toe Nails on the F

your nails, clear as quartz,
beckon; for saints have toes that
pilgrims lips do touch.

Thursday, August 7, 2008

Chrome

Chrome, or Rear Entry

two chairs bask in the
sepia glow of street lamps
because they're garbage.

Tuesday, August 5, 2008

bivalves

bivalves, or Late Night Phone Call

laura
urgently
informs me that they now make
clamato + beer.

Saturday, August 2, 2008

moving

moving, or We're Keeping The Pez Dispensers Dammit!

if you want to keep
every paper back we've
ever come across--

fine. but don't talk to
me about getting rid of
bookcases, okay?

dream #17

dream #17, or An Evening with Pamela

at a county fair
Victoria Principal
look-alikes stand round

the blueberry pie
booth batting their doe eyes
and speaking in tongues.

Thursday, July 31, 2008

you-tica

you-tica, or This One's for Little Laura (part deux)

you drool on my sheets.
you drink my booze. you steal my
tampax. i miss you.

cardboard

cardboard, or When Life Gives You Lemons

i feel like such a
failure when i can't rip a
match stick from its book.

dream #16

dream #16, or Snacking on the Job

cheez doodle stains trace
the walls of a cheap no-tell
motel's entry way

because a fat cop
was too lazy to wash up
after a drug bust.

cowgirl

cowgirl, or A Discouraging Word

you've been out on the
range long enough. bring your
horsey back to town.

Friday, July 25, 2008

lettuce

lettuce, or A Day Late

don't wilt on me now.
things were so good between us!
i'm sorry, baby.

Thursday, July 24, 2008

them #2

them #2, or The Real Story

or maybe i just
feel like a complete failure:
an empty breadbox.

them

them, or A Call to Arms

seeing these people
with their dull, sausage-link arm
children makes me fume.

we'll take over the
world whilst they busy themselves
with blocks and nappies.

Wednesday, July 23, 2008

dream #15

dream #15, or The Slaughter

decapitation
a la caravaggio when
a pub brawl goes south.

Thursday, July 17, 2008

supplies

supplies, or Just Another Visit to the Pagan Mega-Store

"yeah, i'll take forty
locks of hair, nine cauldrons, ten
sacrificial goats,

six thousand feathers,
and five brooms. do you guys have
free delivery?"

Wednesday, July 16, 2008

dream #14

dream #14, or Windfall

a greeting card that
contains 3000$
in twenties arrives.

dream #13

dream #13, or The Uncanny Valley

i rock a robot
babe, implanted with a
piece of my brother's

brain, as my grandma's
ghost looks on. my sister puts
a parcel at my

feet, and the child says,
"sue the bastards! man, i can't
wait to catch some rays!"

odysseus

odysseus, or What Evil Lurks in the Hearts of Men?

the shadow slides in
under the door; we dine, drink,
converse, and then we

sleep, content. rosey-
fingered dawn breaks, and my
visitor is gone.

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

dream #12

dream #12, or The Celebrity

i slam my fist on
a revolving door's window
and tell Mr. Pitt

"she isn't laughing
because it's not funny!" then
slink off, ill with guilt.

Friday, July 11, 2008

dream #11

dream #11, or Time to Settle Down

i recover from
a grueling birth, and opt
to can cling peaches.

Saturday, July 5, 2008

today

today, or You Can't Operate in a Vacuum.

how'd i find myself
with you: this woman i can't
live without. (she eats

her ice cream like a
retard with a donut.) hey
shut up and come here.

waiting

waiting, or A Plan or Canal

a man, a pizza,
a train, a career, a date,
a cab: PANAMA.

Thursday, July 3, 2008

groups

groups, or Collectives of Flying Things

a fever of rays,
a richness of martens, and
a murder of crows;

a charm of finches,
a smuck of jellyfish, and
a filth of starlings.

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

observation

observation, or To the Beautiful Blond

to the beautiful
blond on the R: how did your
feet get so filthy?

dream #10

dream #10, or Late Cretaceous Mongolia

soon after learning
that velociraptors have
brutally killed

my brother, i take
to keeping bees in my late
grandmother's backyard.

Sunday, June 22, 2008

dream #9

dream #9, or The Actor

h ford and i live
together in a sweeping
downtown brooklyn loft;

life's picture perfect,
except that he refuses
to have intercourse.

Tuesday, June 10, 2008

dream #8

dream #8, or Two Scoops of Raisins

i'm teaching fractions
in a classroom constructed
of bulk cereal bins.

an ex boyfriend in
lederhosen lurks outside
behind the froot loops.

Sunday, June 8, 2008

thermodynamics

thermodynamics, or How A.C.s work

lets throw rocks at the
window units! they shit out
all that god damn heat
.

Thursday, June 5, 2008

A.M.

A.M., or Mommie Dearest

our building's filled
with babies, and each morning
they cry like sissies.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

legal tender #2

legal tender #2, or It's All About the Jeffersons

spent a two dollar
bill today on pez. asks the
clerk: "is this legal?"

Monday, June 2, 2008

flip-flops

flip-flops, or Don't Worry, Your Dad's Still Proud!

"this job's different
than the one i would've had
working at Bear Stearns"

Sunday, June 1, 2008

legumes

legumes, or Buried Treasure

a squirrel planted
a peanut in my basil.
i found it this morn.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

blueberry

blueberry, or This One's for Little Laura

when i was young my
sister had a stuffed mouse
called blueberry

he was grey and felt
like he was filled with rice
rather than stuffing

Tuesday, May 27, 2008

dream #7

dream #7 , or legal tender

a wallet full of
thirty-three dollar bills and
donuts for breakfast

Friday, May 23, 2008

o!

o! or Tears of a Mouse

'made me miss my mouse'
possibly the best phrase that's
ever been typed.

dream #6

dream #6, or 'it's like riding a bike!'

i'm caught up in a
high speed chase on an icy
freeway, when my car

becomes a uni-
cycle. i escape via
ladder to the sky.

Tuesday, May 20, 2008

wonderful

wonderful, or "It's Ebbed and Flowed"

"duder, has your birth-
day gotten any better since
you've hung out with me?"

(there's so much that i
do not say, cause the right words
just don't come my way.)

Thursday, May 15, 2008

ra ra RITTER!

ra ra RITTER! or Good News for Sarah

the Ritter 'joghurt'
package now boasts a "new and
improved flavour!"

but if tasting is
believing, then i'm still too
scared to believe.

may sweeps

may sweeps, or Reoccurring Themes

last night's dream: i
rescue two kittens from a
spin cycle, miss a

college class, and end
up in another steaming-
hot love triangle.

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

mr. mister

mr. mister, or Sleeping Diagonally in Bed

he's gone again, so
the only one moaning for
dinner is the cat.

Sunday, May 4, 2008

trapdoor

trapdoor, or Escape Hatch

let me be your trap-
door. you'll emerge from the
sadness into us.

Friday, May 2, 2008

8$

8$, or Cranky At The Key Foods

today's impulse buys:
a panda bar, one beer,
and spanish saffron.

Thursday, May 1, 2008

spy

spy, or Me & My Broken Leg

across the alley
a lady in bell bottoms
just dropped her blinds.

Tuesday, April 29, 2008

wandering

wandering, or Fun and Affordable

last night's dream: i walk
alone along the highway
until i find a

strip mall. i stop in
the Fashion Bug. my mom's there.
Janet is playing.

i shop for terry
cloth shorts, then Mom takes me home
for homemade peach pie.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Saturday, April 26, 2008

super!

super! or à la Rushmore

last night's dream: a friend
and i bust into a hos-
pital room with a

super
of bees. our
grand escape involves turfing
the parking lot's lawn.

Tuesday, April 22, 2008

joy

joy, or No Joy?

outside a child shrieks
NO NO NO NO NO NO NO
over and over.

insight

insight, or zion ii

the mysterious
seaside town at dusk was none
other than Blacksburg.

Monday, April 21, 2008

zion

zion, or Youthful Yearning

last night's dream: comic
book villains chase us through the
mountains, then across

a precarious
rope bridge. an adopted boy
we call Zion morphs

into my pre-teen
brother. we dine on the docks
at an open-air

clam shack, in spite of
my shellfish allergy. the sun
sets on the water.

Saturday, April 19, 2008

hymenoptera

hymenoptera, or "Married Wing"

first things first: wasps are
carnivorous, while bees eat
protein-rich pollen.

the brood cluster has
broken up, and the workers
ready for summer;

they pack pollen in
their hollow legs, and suck the
nectar. then they dance.

Tuesday, April 8, 2008

tex-mex

tex-mex, or Face the Dragon

pretty much, if i'm
not sweating while eating, the
burrito's no good.

Monday, April 7, 2008

exercise?

exercise? or Eat, Drink, and Be Merry, for Tomorrow We May Diet.

joined a gym and
celebrated by downing
a sleeve of saltines,

a monstrous amount
of falafel, cola and malt
balls. fitness... HOORAY!

(today's long title
comes from a magnet that my
mom had on the fridge.)

Tuesday, April 1, 2008

cards

cards, or Greetings from a Strange Land

wrap-arounds, no wilds,
cards under ten all worth five.
rummy with mom: nuts.

Saturday, March 29, 2008

trit trot

trit trot, or What 5$ Can Buy These Days

ponies gallop through
my skull in the wee hours.
dull headaches galore.

Friday, March 28, 2008

karate

karate, or 45$ Down the Drain

might not sound like much,
fifteen pounds. two human heads,
three bags of sugar,

an infant. you try
hauling this lug home from a
futile vet visit.

Thursday, March 27, 2008

affirmations

affirmations, or Conversations with Freud at the Met

johns' iterative
studies in gray -- numbers, flags,
letters, and bull's eyes --

help soften the sting of
my own artistic fancies:
lampreys and gherkins.

**
(now to enjoy a
gin martini, dry, and a
couple cornichons!)

Saturday, March 22, 2008

mousy!

mousy! or Miss Susie Had a Steamboat

here we are ten years
later -- drunk -- still laughing at
the same vulgar jokes.

Wednesday, March 12, 2008

cauliflower

cauliflower, or Translation: NO.

"don't we have REAL food?"
like the big bowl of pickled
veggies doesn't count!

Tuesday, March 11, 2008

this and that, or Margaritas with Danielle

seven sacraments, or # 5, 6 optional

baptism, first euchar-
ist, reconcile, confirm, wed,
holy orders, death.



fire me, or Give Me a Raise!

drunk and clutching a
bag of smut, i wave at my
students, "STUDY UP!"

Sunday, March 2, 2008

the priestess

the priestess, or Knowing How to Pray to the Mantis

her incantations
electrify, and she
cuts you when you fuck.

Saturday, March 1, 2008

fever

fever, or Me and Duder Down by the Schoolyard

last night's dream: we are
two almonds traversing the
japanese country-

side. we befriend a
soybean and happen upon
baby rabbits. bliss.

Sunday, February 24, 2008

blind

blind, or Last Night's Shenanigans

i've sworn off tasting
menus with wine pairings for
the rest of my days.

Monday, February 18, 2008

homonyms?

homonyms, or The Wonders of Mink Oil

"my boots look great now."
his slow reply: "yes... they do."
"i said boots, not BOOBS."

Monday, February 4, 2008

debut

debut, or Theme for Last Week

could not stop humming
the song from Bowser's Gun Ship.
BOOHF! go the cannons.